The Barefoot CEO

The Sink Is NOT the Dishwasher

admin — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 19:17:15 +0000

I am hearing from more and more of you, and after a chat with my friend Ranae, it is becoming quite clear that this is the summer adult children are descending upon us like locus. Maybe they arrived back home because they could no longer afford rent, maybe they lost their job and had to return to the nest, perhaps they just graduated from college only to discover their degree isn’t going to help land the job they had hoped for in this challenging economy, or maybe they are just home for the summer between semesters? Whatever the reason may be, more and more adult children are living at home these days.

We thought we needed an owner’s manual when they were born! Ha! Where is the guidebook to help navigate this ever-shifting landscape??? What exactly are the rules? We are all adults here, but somehow I found myself reminding grown people to pick up their towels and stop leaving a trail behind them.

My husband, father of these two lovely offspring who descended upon us last summer, reached his breaking point. After nagging and painstakingly pointing out that the dishwasher is mere inches from the sink, and that the dishes must actually be loaded into the dishwasher—not just be left in the sink—hung a sign.

Maybe next we can tackle grocery consumption, i.e. there is a store right down the street, feel free at any point to replace some of the food you have devoured. After that we are going to work on liquor cabinet protocol. If we are all going to live together, Mommy must have some tequila left in the house!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Powerful Beyond Measure

admin — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 22:17:35 +0000

Several years ago I was talking with a woman I considered invincible. She was an athlete, a woman who ran marathons, went backpacking alone, and climbed mountains most only view from the ground. I was telling her how much I envied her courage and lack of fear. She looked at me and smiled, and then told me something I have never forgotten; she was afraid too. It was an amazing revelation to me that the women we admire for daring such courageous feats are really no different than us. The difference isn’t that they aren’t afraid and we are, the difference is that they do it anyway.

I always keep this quote hanging on my bulletin board, “When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.” Audre Lorde.

Moving through fear can mean daring to cut off the long hair you have had all of your life or starting a new business. Sometimes we need to take a deep breath, and sometimes we may even need a push before we can take that scary leap of faith.

Perhaps it is not failure we fear, but success. Nelson Mandela once said, “Our worst fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”

Dig out your Helen Reddy tape (yes chances are it isn’t on CD) and sing along to I am woman hear me roar….

Go ahead be powerful beyond measure!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Love the One Your With–Lumps and All

admin — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 16:33:18 +0000

The other day I was searching for a photo for a new picture frame I’d just bought. I sorted through dozens of vacation snapshots—the ones I keep telling myself I will some day put in adorable scrapbooks—but for now they sit in shoe boxes.

As I poured over the pictures I had a few good laughs going down memory lane. The good times, the bad times, and the what-were-you-thinking clothes and haircuts.

Then I found the unthinkable—an old picture of me in a bikini! My husband had managed to snap a full-length shot of me on the beach. I was instantly transported back to that day almost 20 years ago. I vividly remembered changing swimming suits three or four times that morning trying to find one I thought best hid my love handles.

As I thought back about the morning, and how self-conscious I felt about wearing a bikini, I feel really stupid. Because you know what—that mother of two looked just fine. And yet I wasted precious energy and time stressing out over my not perfect body. What an idiot!

Twenty years later I would love to have that body back. That very same body I anguished over back then! It was a real ah-ha moment for me. Twenty years from now I will most likely wish I had the body back that I have today.

The reality is even the women we think have perfect bodies aren’t content. We are ALL spending way too much time on if-only. If only I wasn’t sagging here or there. If only I didn’t have stretch marks. If only I didn’t have these saddle bags.

The moral of the story is… love the body you have RIGHT NOW.

Think of all the energy we waste worrying about wrinkles, cellulite, belly pouch and gray hair. Does it really matter? NO. Never was that more clear than when I stared at that photo from two decades ago and lamented over the time and energy lost worrying about nothing. I vowed right then and there to spend my time appreciating health and well being instead of berating myself over silly things like stretch marks.

Let’s start today loving and accepting ourselves—lumps and all.

I challenge you to give yourself the gift of perspective. Go get out an old photo of yourself. Remember what you worried about back then… Not so bad, huh. So be gentler with the body you have today.

Don’t waste another minute of your precious time worrying about cellulite! That is what self-tanner is for. Ha!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Go Out On a Limb!

admin — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 17:15:10 +0000

I just went to lunch with a friend, and as gals do we got talking about, well everything… and it seems a lot of women are in the midst of big, bold, brave life changes right now. I think it is really exciting to see women decide they aren’t waiting anymore to start following their hearts, checking off their life lists and discovering their passions. One friend is going to become a yoga instructor, one is heading to South Africa, another is writing a book.

Our conversation got me thinking about a truly inspiring video my daughter sent me a while back that actually made me gasp out loud. And I can’t seem to stop thinking about it.

So what was so jaw dropping about this video? Well, first let me tell you that it’s a video of my daughter’s childhood best friend. Libby was like part of the family when our kids were growing up.

This awe-inspiring video will amaze you too. Take a look for yourself and see the height—literally—of bravery and determination in following a dream. And it all begins with having the courage to take that first step toward a goal, and the persistence to keep putting one foot in front of the other until we reach the other side.

We may not have the moxie to walk across a high wire nearly 3000 feet above the Yosemite Valley floor, but we all have hopes, dreams, and secret ambitions.

Have you lost your sense of adventure? Is she buried? It is time to let her out!

This month I dare you to try something new. Take that painting class you have always wanted to sign up for, go backpacking for the first time, start the business you have been dreaming about, plant the garden you have always wanted. Dare to dream, dare to have fun!

Maybe we don’t all have to walk across Yosemite, but we do have to go out on a limb in order to reach our dreams.

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Maybe It’s Time to Revise?

admin — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 12:48:24 +0000

Sometimes on the way to your dream you get lost and find a better one. Now more than ever I am finding people are truly reevaluating life. Perhaps with our ever-changing landscape now is the perfect time to step back and ponder what other paths we might have taken, what passions and pursuits we wished we had let our hearts follow. It is okay to change our minds and it’s never too late to start.

Many years ago a friend gave me a gift with the inscription, “It is never too late in fiction or in life to revise.”

So what new adventure might you begin? What does your heart long to do? If you start something exciting be sure to comment and let me know!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Sans Extinguisher for Me Please

admin — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 23:09:52 +0000

I believe there are two groups of people; those who like to live with a fire extinguisher on each hip and those who don’t. I fall into the don’t category. I like to avoid those last minute fires whenever possible.

I figure life hands us enough twists and turns that can’t be prevented. I am sure as heck not going to add any fuel to the fire by being unorganized. But lately it seems I have been surrounded by the friggin fire department!

One last minute challenge after another keeps popping up and smoldering, many of which could have been prevented with a bit of organization and communication.

Good thing this don’t has a sense of humor and an extra bucket around just in case.

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

A Hairy Situation

admin — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 13:46:36 +0000

The heat is on so I braved my first trip to the local pool. Ladies what is the deal? More and more of us gals are starting to wonder out loud why it is okay for men to walk around like Sasquatch while women get dirty looks if we show up with a tiny bit of stubble on our legs.

We are expected to fight nature and wax, shave, tweeze and otherwise electronically torture ourselves into sleek hairless creatures. Why is their hair okay and our hair somehow unacceptable?

I am getting simply fed up with this notion of demanding increasingly less and less hair on women while men get to wander around perfectly comfortable with their five o’clock shadows, their Andy Rooney-like eye brows and their hairy backs!

My friend, who shall remain nameless—okay it was Doug—told me that he thinks women should all be getting Brazilian waxes.Oh really? Ladies, lets start suggesting all men get the Guyzilian wax! A past issue of Men’s Journal says this is a sign of the apocalypse—well guess what guys—we thought the same thing when mandatory Brazilian waxing became trendy!

When I went to Europe much to my delight I discovered that women there were lounging at the beach eating carbs, avoiding razors and enjoying themselves! Hmmm… I think they are on to something!

They say all fashion is cyclical. So when is that full length swimming suit coming back?

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Float Time

admin — Sat, 29 May 2010 17:20:55 +0000

If you read my last posting you know I have been in need of more than a chiropractic adjustment, I needed an attitude adjustment!

I have often said when kids are crabby put them in water. I think this applies to big kids too.

When my kids were little I would instantly put them in water if they were irritable. When they were babies I would give them a bath when they were fussy. As they got older I would send them out to the pool. Their pleasing personalities soon returned.

I am a firm believer there isn’t much a bath won’t cure. Water will go a long way toward improving one’s temperament.

My favorite relaxing technique is floating. Give me a lake, pool or better yet ocean, and something to float on and I am in heaven. That is my ultimate form of relaxation. I actually count it as meditation.

Well, now we have diagnosed the problem, a case of crabby. And prescribed the cure. The doctor orders 3 hours of float time, taken once a day for 2 days. Throw in a margarita for good measure!

Cheers!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Words Have Power

admin — Thu, 27 May 2010 11:58:54 +0000

For several weeks I have been referring to a situation as a pain in the ass. It has been frustrating and draining. I like a drama free zone, and it has been anything but around here lately. One of those times, whether on the home front or at work we all want to look back on—not be in the middle of.

I know better, hell I write about, talk about it, and truly do get the power of our words. And here I have been week after exasperating week going on and on about what a pain in the ass this situation is.

Blame it on lack of sleep, blame it on a moment of weakness, blame it on oops I did it again, but you know how this story ends… guess who has a pain in the ass? That’s right boys and girls here it is four o’clock in the morning and I am writing about the literal pain in my ass because I can’t sleep due to the flare up of my sciatic nerve.

Who feels like a horses ass now?

Lesson learned. Note taken. A painful reminder that our words have power. Change of plans, from here to forth I shall be saying, wow I am so lucky to be learning so much from this exciting process. I am sure it’s all working out exactly as it is meant to be.

Giddy Up!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Go With the Flow

admin — Wed, 26 May 2010 22:54:29 +0000

The other day I was trying to untangle a bunch of necklaces that had become twisted up together in one big ball of knots. After about twenty extremely frustrating minutes on this mess it became quite clear to me that the harder I pulled on each chain, the more ensnarled it all became.

Half an hour into this tedious project I decided to just relax and work each chain with patience. Slowly I began to tug at the ball of knotted up necklaces, winding each chain up, back, around and gently through until at long last it was free from the twisted up pile.

It dawned on me when I finished the project and hung up all five necklaces, just how much this process is like life in general. When we try to force things, pulling too hard in the wrong direction, life fights back. When we relax and go with the flow, life tends to unfold just how it is supposed to.

The next night as I put one of the necklaces on I felt pure gratification.

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Take a Break!

admin — Fri, 14 May 2010 19:11:30 +0000

I was chatting with a friend yesterday who was at the end of her rope. She said she felt like she was clinging to her last shred of sanity. We have all been there at one point or another. As she was sharing her feelings of exasperation it dawned on me that men never seem to feel like they are going “crazy” when they are overwhelmed? They innately realize what they need is a break, not a break down.

“Over the years, I have often called my dear sister, my lifeline, when I felt like I was crossing the line between sane and crazy—when I thought my own nervous breakdown was imminent. Every time I reached out to her, she reminds me—over and over again—that I can check into a five-star hotel, order room service, and get a massage every day for a week for a helluva lot less money than what it costs to check into a sanitarium. She should know! She is still trying to pay off her medical bills from her a stay in the psych ward and she says she would have been better off at a resort. She jokes that all she got was bad hospital food, scratchy sheets and poor counseling.

So whenever I am so stressed out I feel like I am teetering on the edge of sanity, I call my lifeline—she reminds me there is a reason so many women feel like they are about to have a nervous breakdown: they need a break. And she gives me permission to take one.”

That was an excerpt from my new book, Oh Thank Goodness, It’s Not Just Me. Available www.Simple Truths.com

Women, you are not alone! We share so many of the same feelings and experiences.

A trip to the stress-free beach beats a trip in a straight jacket any day!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

It’s a Phase

admin — Mon, 10 May 2010 15:43:54 +0000

I was in a store a few days ago watching a young Mom juggle three small children. At the check out counter the woman ringing her up smiled and said “Don’t worry, it will get easier.” I wanted to tell her the truth.

I have come to realize the unspoken truth of motherhood. It gets harder, not easier. When my kids were babies, I thought if I could just get them in school it would get easier. Once they were in school I thought if I could just survive their teenage years it would get easier. Once they were in high school it was all about hanging in there until they went to college. They are adults now. I am no longer in denial.

The fact is, when you put your whole heart and soul into it, involved parenting is never easy and the older your kids get the higher the stakes become.

Why don’t owners manuals come standard-issue when you give birth or adopt a baby? Raising children raises a lot of questions. Will a Mothers vast amount of love and dedication be enough to help make their hopes and dreams come true? How do you keep them safe? It is an awesome responsibility, one I have never taken lightly and one that often feels very heavy indeed.

Each age comes with each own nuances and challenges. I am convinced the reason our babies (think adorable puppies) are so cute is simply so we won’t send them back when they are keeping us up all night. I am also convinced that the reason they turn into teenagers (think dogs) is so when they leave for college we are ready to let them go.

Just think about it, if our children stayed in the adorable puppy phase forever we would never want them to move out. Nature thought of everything and designed teenagers specifically to address that issue. Having said that, now with an empty nest I wonder where the instructions are for this next era of parenting. That’s right—apparently the beat goes on!

And this seems to be the phase—isn’t there always a “phase” when it comes to kids—that nobody talks about. Or should I say warns you about. The 20 to 30 phase. Parents all sigh together whenever teenagers are discussed and collectively cringe over the terrible two’s, but I didn’t hear much about the joys the transitional twenties.

The college years come with decisions that are bigger, consequences that are deeper, and the hope and prayer that you instilled in them the love, principles and fortitude to get through the next decade—or should I say “phase”.

As I face this scary time of letting my kids grow and take risks, I find myself taking lots of deep breaths and reflecting on when they were little. The challenges we faced then seemed so overwhelming. I had no idea back then that potty training would be the easy part.

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Say Yes Often

admin — Fri, 07 May 2010 17:44:41 +0000

Not only is Mother’s Day around the corner, May 2^nd was Jordan’s birthday. I feel compelled to remind everyone how precious life is and how important it is live it with passion.

Jordan Chiovarelli was one of those charismatic characters you couldn’t help but love. He was my daughter Harlie’s best friend. She adored him and he looked after her like a big brother. He was like a member of the family.

On Jordan’s last visit to Las Vegas he came to stay with us for a week. One night he and Harlie tried to convince my husband Jeff—who Jordan always called Pops—and I to go out with them. We said we were too old to hang with the twenty-something crowd, said we were too tired, said we had to go to work in the morning…but Jordan was having none of it. He was determined to drag Pops and me out on the town with them. He had a grin you couldn’t resist and a way of coaxing you into anything.

Just like Jordan convinced us to say yes that night, he always said yes to life. He loved to ride motorcycles and planned to open up a shop back in Long Island one day. He was an avid and talented competitive skier who traveled the world in pursuit of the sport that was his passion.

Jordan seemed invincible. And then early one morning the call came. Harlie on the other end of the phone telling me the unimaginable. Jordan had been killed in a motorcycle accident. That was impossible. He was so full of life.

My mind immediately flashed back to that night. I was so grateful he had convinced us to say yes. So grateful I didn’t miss out on creating those memories.

As a mother I can’t imagine anything more painful than having to bury a child. I think about his Mom every day.

In honor of her, please go hug your kids, let them know how much you love them. In honor of Jordan, go hug your Mom and let her know just how much you appreciate her, just like Jordan did. I know how much Jordan loved his Mom, Rita. In fact the last time he and Harlie were talking on the phone, he was cooking dinner for his Mom. That’s the kind of kid Jordan was.

A foundation has been established in Jordan’s honor to support the cause he was most passionate about. www.jordanchiovarellifoundation.org

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Sweet Surrender

admin — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 22:43:41 +0000

This is the year I am going to stop fighting nature… I am apparently born to be a bad packer. I have spent a lifetime trying to master the art of packing. I really want to be one of those people who can show up with a small carry-on bag for a 5-day business trip. Alas, valiant efforts and hundreds of thousands of frequent-flier miles later, I am still a bad packer.

So I am surrendering! I am giving in to my bad packing ways. This year I am going to embrace my inner over-packing self. I am going to check in my luggage–filled with too many shoes and too many clothing options, and I am just going to relax and smile when they give me that judgmental look and tell me they need to weigh my bag. I am going to stop stressing out about trying to be a good packer and continue to over-pack—with abandon and joy!

Once I made this life-changing decision, the metaphorical weight of trying to be a good packer was lifted, and the literal weight of my suitcase increased. I am oh-so liberated! Now when I get my bag out to get ready for a trip, I no longer kid myself that this will be the trip I leave with only a carry-on bag. I no longer stress out about it, I simply pack what I want and stop worrying about it. Freedom!

It got me thinking about all of the things we continually try to change about ourselves. I have no doubt I lost months of my life while trying to blow-dry my naturally curly hair as a teenager back when Farah’s straight, smooth locks were all the rage.

What areas of your life could you just release and accept? Perhaps we should stop fighting our quirks and accept them as part of our endearing nature? What are you going to surrender to?

Loving my liberation!

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®

Looking for My Pot of Gold

admin — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 17:38:01 +0000

Am I the only one with a growing stack of receipts, credit card bills and IRS forms about to smother me? I think April 15th should be a national holiday—so we at least get a day off. Or maybe it should be April 16^th so we can recover and lick our wounds!

Have you ever noticed Attorney, Accountant, and Agony all start with A? I am kidding…kidding!

I actually really like my accountant. (Craig, you know I adore you.) Yet, honestly I’d rather have a root canal than look at one more bank statement or fill out one more form!

Calling the IRS hotline feels like a set up, you get a different answer every time. I think I will fill out my tax return in pencil just in case…

Happy paper trails,

Lisa Hammond
The Barefoot CEO ®